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Jul. 28th, 2008

  • 9:04 AM
mmm guinea pig
we're coming down to the nitty gritty of the wedding planning. found out that more out of town relatives are coming than i thought would give a shit. on the one hand that's wonderful. but it also means that we're left with like 6 openings for local friends. narrowing down the guestlist will be much harder than i anticipated. rough plans are in the mix for a kick ass post wedding party just for friends that will happen once we get back from the honeymoon. so at least we'll still get to celebrate with everybody in some fashion.

in the meantime, i need feedback on a protocol question. is it rude to invite someone to the bridal shower and then not invite them to the wedding due to the size limitations? what about the bachelorette party?

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[info]hektikat wrote:
Jul. 28th, 2008 04:24 pm (UTC)
To answer your question, unfortunately, it would be rude. I know you don't intend to be, but when bridal showers and bachlorette parties involve an outpouring of money/gifts to the bride, it would be bad form to collect and then not extend an invite to the wedding.

But this is in general. Friends may understand and not have a problem with it.
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[info]machine_kisses wrote:
Jul. 28th, 2008 04:48 pm (UTC)
It is not rude to invite them to the bridal shower as long as it is separated from the bridal shower that members of the wedding party are going too.(Maid of honor excluded). You can have as many bridal showers as you want. The Idea is to welcome the new bride into the institution of marriage and equip her with the tools and support necessary to create a loving nurturing home.

Bachlorette parties are "anything goes", all bets are off.
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[info]ersigh wrote:
Jul. 28th, 2008 08:24 pm (UTC)
I don't think that's rude at all.

... Hmm, I saw the other responses...

It seems to me that if you explain that there are size restrictions but that you still want to share this special event with friends as much as possible, that it won't be rude.

Granted, I have little use for bullshit social expectations and if I were in your position I'd probably just write anyone off who felt offended as being self important jerks.

Edited at 2008-07-28 08:26 pm (UTC)
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[info]divia wrote:
Jul. 28th, 2008 09:39 pm (UTC)
Not rude at all!

I think it's best to tell them ahead of time about not being invited to one but not the other for size limits.

I'm sure they'd understand.
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